As nurses, when we have a family member in the hospital, it is very comforting to know that the nurse caring for them is someone we know. I know this because a very good friend had a family member in this hospital this week under the saddest and worst of circumstances and she was so comforted by the fact that the assigned nurses were long time friends and co-workers.
For the nurses caring for the patient, it is another story. When the outcome is not good, when the circumstances are sad and complicated, it makes a challenging situation so much more so. I know this because I saw it in the nurses' eyes. When I commented that I appreciated how hard it was for these nurses, I saw tears and pain. It was impossible for the nurses to protect themselves, they were involved in the pain and sadness.
We are supposed to have empathy, to express our caring but also maintain professional distance. When it's someone we know and love, when we know our friend and co-worker is going to experience a horrible loss, that all goes out the window.
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