An ARNP asked me, “why do you always say you’re sorry when
you call me?”
My response: Because
I really am sorry that I’m bothering you!
All of the literature on communication between nurses and
physicians and other providers asserts that nurses should not begin with an
apology. Lindaman (1995) says that when
you apologize in the context of contacting a provider for patient care issues,
you diminish your own value.
(In the description of Lindaman as an author, she is
described as a “head nurse”, which shows you how long this advice of not
apologizing has been around)
Honestly, I kind of got used to apologizing when I realized
that a physician I worked with regularly really
responded to apologies. It seemed to
have an effect opposite of what the literature says – he actually seemed to
have more respect for those who apologized.
I guess that starting with an apology hasn’t been a concern
of mine because I don’t have that much trouble getting what I believe patients
need from providers. After all, I’m old
and I’m bold. Apparently, I’m able to,
as Lindaman puts it “set a tone that assumes that compliance is inevitable”
(Great phrase, isn’t it?”).
What do you think? Is
starting with I’m Sorry really so bad?
Reference
Lindaman, C. (1995). Talking to Physicians about Pain
Control. The American Journal of Nursing, 95(1), 36-37.
doi:10.2307/3471499
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